As we gear up for another season of relentless sun and suspicious pool water, let’s talk about how to do this without ending up in the ER or on a viral “pool fail” video.
Swim Safety: No, Seriously, Pay Attention
Before your kids hit the water, we need to cover a few things because, frankly, we’ve all seen what happens when guidelines are ignored, and nobody needs that level of chaos.
Swimming Lessons: Not Just for the Olympics
Enroll your kids in swimming lessons. Early. Like, yesterday. It’s not just about making them back-stroke prodigies—it’s about making sure they won’t sink like rocks when they inevitably try to follow the big kids to the deep end.
Life Jackets: Because Fashion Can Save Lives
Get those U.S. Coast Guard-approved life jackets. Ignore the eye rolls. Your child’s adorable protest about how uncool it is can be addressed in their future therapy sessions. Safety first, kiddo.
Active Supervision: You’re Not a Helicopter, You’re a Drone
Watch your kids like the NSA. No distractions. This means putting down your phone, forgetting about your book, and delaying any gossip with other parents until the kids are safely drying off and eating snacks.
Choosing the Right Swimsuit: It’s Not Just About The Gram
Picking a swimsuit should be more strategic than planning a trip to Disney. Here’s how to nail it:
1. Fit: Think Snug as a Bug, Not Tight as a Tourniquet
The swimsuit should fit well—this isn’t the time for “they’ll grow into it.” We’re avoiding both wardrobe malfunctions and suits that look like they’ve been borrowed from a younger sibling.
2. UV Protection: Because You’re Not Actually a Vampire
Yes, they make UV protective swimwear now. Buy it. It’s like sunscreen you can’t sweat off. It’s one less thing to worry about, and honestly, we could all use less to worry about.
3. Visibility: Think Neon Rave, But Pool-Safe
Bright colors. I’m talking visible-from-space, possibly glow-in-the-dark shades. It makes your child easier to spot, reducing your chances of a heart attack when you lose sight of them for a second.
4. Style: Let Them Have a Say
Let your kids pick their own swimwear. It gives them a sense of control and ensures they’ll actually wear it. If it makes them feel like they’re a superhero or turns them into a baby shark (doo doo doo), even better. Just remember the fit and visibility rules.
5. Parting Wisdom: Enjoy It, It Goes Fast
Summer is fleeting. One day you’re worrying about swim safety, and the next, you’re sending them off to college with a slightly less moldy swimsuit. Embrace the chaos, apply the sunscreen, and maybe this year, actually get in the pool with them.
