- We all want our mom tribe, but where do you find it?
- Finding your tribe when you’re the first of your friends to have a baby
Motherhood is celebrated as it should be for it is a shift from before baby/children and where we are now. Personally, the first baby is where I found myself struggling. I assumed that motherhood would something that would instantly bond me with other mothers. Not so. If anything there were feelings of isolation especially the first few months of entering into this unique club. But where to start?
Connecting with your fellow parent is important in knowing you’re not alone, not losing your sanity and all around vibing with a group of fellow mothers who ‘get you.’ Fortunately and this will happen for you, promise, I found my groove with some help from my new friends.
Join a Newborn Parents Meet Up
Many communities offer parent groups that meet at the park, libraries and other community spaces. Not only does this introduce you to fellow mothers who live in the same neighborhood these are the people who are going to get what you are going through now that you have a new babe in your world.
For me, I had been working a corporate job and was not in touch with like-minded parents. Exhaustion and feeling a bit lost during maternity leave I didn’t know of parent groups. When I ran into an acquaintance, I knew through my husband suggested I join her parent’s group it was a game changer. Meeting these moms with infants around the same age as my son was a new world for me. Now eight years after joining this group I am still friendly with a large part of this community and have a tight tribe of moms that I rely on for emotional support.
Online Communities are 24/7
Especially in the early days when all you want to do is stay in and get acquainted with your little one an online community has many advantages. What may these be? Someone other then your self is also up at 3 am. You can search for specific topics when in a pinch. You are connecting with parents around the world yet realizing that your shared messages are helping others get through the stages of parenting. There are also specific online groups. Once my oldest son started to show some delays I joined a forum to help me navigate through Early Intervention. The most recent community I belonged to was an adoption Facebook page that quite honestly was a support that I’m not sure what I would have done without had these lovely people encouraged and help me with valuable information in what can be a vulnerable process.
Introduce Yourself to that Mom at the Park
Parks are a huge part of having a kid especially if you live in the city. If not in the town you may see the same mom at the grocery store. You may have locked eyes but have been too shy to say hello. Muster up the courage, say hello,
Stay in touch with old friends
It is easy to lose touch with the friends who may not be in the same place as you. Staying in touch with your friends whether they go the family route or remain single can be a challenge as lives tend to lead some on different paths. What one of the gifts motherhood gives us is the knowledge that time is precious. Don’t be shy to be selfish on what friends you continue to nurture; social media allows us not to lose sight of people and the ones that we keep and continue to nurture.
Do not be surprised if you find that your tribe isn’t one particular group but people who represent all parts of your life. Threaded together this crew will make up the fabric that is your support system.